A.D.E.P.T. Parenting

“Sons are a heritage from the Lord, children a reward from him.”

– Psalm 127:3

Introduction

Being a parent is an amazing blessing from God, and it also comes with great responsibility. God has entrusted our children to us to steward for His glory, but this doesn’t mean that the demands of parenting come naturally or easily to us. On the contrary, how often have you bemoaned the fact that none of our kids ever seem to come with an instruction manual?

As we've mentioned before, over 60% of children raised in Christian homes are abandoning the church when they leave home. This statistic is sobering and frightening to parents who greatly desire to see their kids walk firmly in their faith. The good news is there are other statistics that suggest that when parents are actively involved in their children’s lives – not just shuttling them to church, school, and activities – and training them in the Word of God at home, they can help change that trajectory.

Training your children with intentionality is not going to happen by chance, which is why having a spiritual growth plan written down is so helpful. There are five main areas that God calls parents to focus on as we steward our kids. These can be easily remembered by the acronym A.D.E.P.T: Attentive, Discipline, Encourage, Provide, and Teach.

A – Attentive

We live in a culture of constant distraction. As parents, it can be a true struggle to be attentive to our children when they want or need our undivided focus. Yet it is critical that we master the art of self-control and - in many cases - self-denial so that we can actively shepherd our children through life’s ups and downs. When a child knows that their father and mother are approachable and interested in their ideas and concerns, he or she is much more likely to see them as a safe place in which to confide. This is our heart’s desire: that our children know they can come to us with anything at any time. We want to be available and encouraging, and we want them to turn to us as their preferred confidants rather than to their friends. Click here to read more about the importance of attentiveness. 

D – Discipline

The task of discipline in a Christian home is an important one and should be taken seriously. It is imperative that the parents are on the same page as they come up with a plan and method of family correction. The main objective of biblical discipline is to point your kids to Jesus. Click here to read more about discipline in a Christian home. 

E – Encourage

One characteristic of a healthy family is the presence of regular encouragement. This goes for adults as well as children. Many parents realize their own need for an encouraging word, but can lack awareness that their children require it as well. Teachers, coaches, and friends can often supply this but as parents, we should strive to be our children’s chief encouragers. This also means that we take great care to avoid discouraging our children. One obvious way to do this is to simply acknowledge and build up our children’s natural giftedness. Click here to read more about how powerful encouragement can be in the lives of your children. 

P – Provide

Providing for one’s family is a responsibility given to parents (especially fathers), and it is something that we strive to take seriously. It doesn’t necessarily take a lot of money to provide well for your family, though we acknowledge that this is not the case in all parts of the country. Living in New York City requires a significantly different paycheck than making a home in Missouri! But just as God gives us the responsibility to provide for our families, He also gives us the means of that provision.

This does not mean that we are guaranteed a large house and high paycheck, nor does it protect us from our own poor monetary choices or tragic medical circumstances that can quickly drain a life savings. In fact, sometimes biblical provision may look like significant downsizing and living on less. As Christians, our job is to live as obediently as we can with the resources God has provided for us, and trust Him to care for His people. After all, He is our ultimate Provider. Click here to read more about the biblical requirement of provision. 

T – Teaching 

As parents, the most important job we have is instructing our children in God’s Word. These precious little ones are given to us to steward and train, and the heavy responsibility of this privilege must be taken very seriously. Teaching God’s Word to our children cannot happen by accident, which means parents must be intentional if they are to fulfill this glorious command. When we obey God in this sacred task, we can have faith that our labor is not in vain. Homes built upon the foundation of Scripture will experience many blessings from the Lord and even future generations will be impacted. Click here to explore how to teach your kids with intentionality. 

Conclusion

Becoming A.D.E.P.T. parents is a journey. It isn’t something that will happen overnight. And remember, there are no perfect parents! At the same time, we want to be doing everything we can to keep our children and families focused on Jesus for the sake of this generation and those to come. Becoming A.D.E.P.T. will not happen without a lot of hard work, but the rewards are truly worth it. We can walk the road of parenting believing that He who has begun a good work in us and in our children will see it to completion, and that we will reap a glorious harvest if we do not give up.

Key Points:

• There are many aspects of parenting that we need to develop on our parenting journey.
• A spiritual growth plan for your family will help keep you focused on Christ.
• As parents, we want to do everything we can to keep our children and families focused on Jesus for the sake of this generation and those to come.